(Long Lost) Friends

I've been thinking a lot about friendships lately, and how they grow, transform, and sometimes dwindle over time. What do we owe the people who have been in our lives for years? Is there a time to let people go? How much responsibility do OTHERS have to US? Mom and I were talking through these things this week....I am who I am largely because of lessons I've learned from my friends. And there are those who have come into my life and stayed for the long haul; those who entered my life for a period of time and then we parted ways, as seemed meant to be; then there are those whom I'm not so sure about--where they fit in the Nathan Puzzle, if you will. I seem to be one of those people who has several close friends, with very intense discussions/conversations. We don't talk often, but when we do catch up it feels like we just spoke yesterday. I don't know if this is because of me--the vibes I give off to people--or if I just attract these same kind of people to me. Maybe it's a little of both. I often ache when I think about folks "long gone." But, really, with the Web and other modern technologies, I know I could track certain individuals down if I needed/wanted to. A.J. Beckert! I miss you! I miss climbing onto the roofs of churches and climbing through the sewers of Lemont and sneaking into abandoned homes and watching scary movies and fighting over pennies at garage sales....Brian Griffin, I miss your openness and laid-back nature....Lauren Cronin, I miss your "being green" comments and your ability to make really kick-ass mix tapes and for being my hot date at the high school prom....Callie Seymour, I miss your love of horror movies and that little dance you did to Depeche Mode's "Personal Jesus" once, and how much strength and courage you showed me when you lost your brother....Should I track these people down? Should I just remember them fondly and keep "moving" on with my life? Interesting questions, I think. I dream of you all sometimes. You all stay inside my pores, skin, and heart....adding to the energy of my muse, the lovely Cassandra.