Garlands

As I mentioned to Ben yesterday, God and I have had some amazing talks lately where I've picked up the coffee tab and she's left fabulous tips. There is something so beautiful, and a touch melancholy, about hanging Christmas ornaments. It's decadent and magical and gaudy and safe all at the same time. I loved hanging lights with Mom on Saturday, fetching Santa, Joseph, Mary, and Baby Jesus--along with those huge wooden carolers--to display outside. Everything felt crisp, clear, and chilly. Tori's song "Garlands" has been one of my Life Songs these past few months, and that song really came into Nathan Play this weekend....the talk of mimosas, the hanging of actual garlands, me chomping on a pirouette and digesting its yummy metaphor....I've had the strangest dreams lately: vampire creatures haunting me in hospitals and office buildings that take the shape of carnival funhouses....riding escalators (I dream about escalators a lot)....mermaids and faeries and poltergeists all trying to get my attention with their stories. I think I can safely say that this is a point in my life where I feel extremely confident, kinda terrified, vulnerable, and more strong than ever. I feel sexy, boyish, and joined. I'm definitely coming to terms--and falling in love with--dichotomy.