Forgiveness

Forgiveness has come up in my life a lot lately. The idea anyway, the heart-discussion, if not always accepted, received, offered, asked for. I recently exchanged an email dialogue with D about forgiveness. Below is the initial jumping off point.
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D,

Thanks so much for that thoughtful care package. I can’t wait to listen to the CD. I’ve never heard of Ashana, and her “angelic” voice will soon be calling my name! It’s fascinating that it’s called, “All Is Forgiven.” On my way to yoga yesterday, before I got home and got your special lil’ present to me, I ended up behind a driver with a bunch of very, very, very Christian bumper stickers all over. They said things like, “JESUS ROCKS!” and “I’M GOING TO HEAVEN….ARE YOU?” I’m purposefully exaggerating those (it’s the court jester in me), but you get the idea. Even their license plate said, “God My”, and my first (wicked and darkly humorous) thought was, “Was ‘My God’ taken, or are they dyslexic or what?” In any case, I got a kick out of them! I mention this all because in the upper right-hand corner of their back window, there was a large sticker that said, simply, FORGIVEN. And then I get home and see this beautiful card, a beautiful message, energy-filled stones, and Ashana’s CD. It’s partly the Catholic school boy in me who will stay eternal, and it’s partly just part of being human, but I think about forgiveness a lot, the concept on a macro level, and how it applies to me on a micro level – the giving and receiving of it – and how it has religious connotations in some ways and simply human connotations in other ways. In the end, I really like that that the flawed, maybe hypocritical part of me was annoyed by this driver (and I say flawed/hypocritical because I have “COEXIST” and other New Age-y bumper stickers on my car….and are they really any different?) , but then I arrive home, and here’s that word “forgiven” again, but in a context I can relate to, a safe space where I can roll that idea around with a loved one, you.

You are the second person in the last couple weeks to send me a care package that holds special stones, stones with energy and wonder and history. As I told J, they remind me of the book/film, The Neverending Story. Have you read/seen it? Both are classics to me – classics of the heart, I mean. I don’t want to give too much away in case you’ve missed out on this one (after all, you don’t know who Wilson Phillips are, you Krazy Kat!), but there’s a scene where characters hold in their hands the final fragments, the final jagged dust motes of imagination, and magic, and believing in a greater good where we are brought together by love rather than destroyed by fear and war. As I finish my novel, the four stones now hold a special place on my writing desk, and they are near the stones that M gave me, with the magic words written on them. But, to quote The Neverending Story, “that is another story for another time.”

Thanks again.

Love,

Nathan

Quote of the Day

"The only way you can write the truth is to assume that what you set down will never be read. Not by any other person, and not even by yourself at some later date. Otherwise you begin excusing yourself. You must see the writing as emerging like a long scroll of ink from the index finger of your right hand; you must see your left hand erasing it.

"Impossible, of course.

"I pay out my line, I pay out my line, this black thread I'm spinning across the page."

Margaret Atwood, The Blind Assassin

Quote of the Day

"....And for so long I let him make me feel unattractive and unsmart. Wait, is 'unsmart' even a word?"

--Nathan Buck to his brother, Aaron Buck, 02/19/09

Happy Monday the 16th!

SPOILER ALERT!

The new Friday the 13th fucking rocked. As in, it's everything diehard fans want while at the same time opening the horror-door for new folks to step into the saga and get a taste of this fresh blood. It's sorta-kinda a remake, incorporating elements from the first four films, but -- and this was unexpected -- it at times plays more like a sequel (the 12th in the series!) that injects a darker, edgier Jason into the mix while also paying homage to those first few films.

The death scenes are brutal, bloody, and brilliant. And this film is SCARY. It also doesn't take itself too seriously. There's some (purposefully?) bad dialogue, lots of breasts, lots of stupid "I'll-go-out-there-alone" moments, but I get the feeling the filmmakers wanted to make it both scary AND irreverent. They wanted to keep the (evil) spirit of the original films alive and not make this reboot too "smart" or "psychological."

I'm hooked (figuratively folks, unless Jason has his way with me with a fishing pole or something). Already can't wait for the inevitable sequel.

And thanks to Meagan for an amazing night! You rock!

Happy Friday the 13th!

Jason sends his regards:

As I've said in previous posts, I always feel bad for the number 13. Poor guy can't help where he fits into the grand scheme of things, you know? I figure it's like a high school cafeteria; I'll invite him -- that little misfit I love so much -- to sit at my table and eat lunch with me. Meagan and I are off to see the remake/reboot/reimagining tonight, and I've been on pins and needles (and machetes) because I'm looking forward to it so much. I've got my Camp Crystal Lake shirt on, my Iron Maiden shoes, and my skull and melting face rings. I'm all set.

I've had the most fascinating few weeks, professionally and personally. Been on a huge learning curve -- that started last year, actually -- and now many of the puzzle pieces are finally coming into place. Have had intense conversations with some folks, and some insights have been revealed that leave me humbled, empowered, and inside those beautiful gray spaces in-between. (Thank you Dawn, Glenn, and Jordan, just to name a few.)

Aaron and Jordan just got hired as extras on TV shows in NYC. Their first days have been over the past week, and they're audience members on the new season of the talk show "The New Newlyweds", with surprise guest host....Carnie Wilson. Now, I LOVE Carnie and Wendy and Chynna from Wilson Phillips; yep, I still listen to their first two albums and love them -- and not in an ironic or guilty pleasure kind of way, either. And yes, I do think they really stretched and deepened on that second album, Shadows and Light, which wasn't as well-received by both critics and the public. So there! The bros tells me that Carnie swears like a sailor, and is hilarious and very down-to-earth. Of course she is! I would expect nothing less!

We had a full moon this week, and the energy is just crackling all over the place. Strange times. Good times. Stranger times.

Stingray Migration

One of the witnesses said they looked like thousands of warm and golden autumn leaves under the water. That's pretty much perfect for this breathtaking glimpse:

mood of the day (but in a good way)

bumper stickers

Yesterday I was driving home from yoga, and I ended up behind a car with two amazing bumper stickers:

"Trees Don't Grow on Money Either"

AND

"God was my copilot but we crashed in the mountains and I ate him"

I laughed and laughed at that latter one. Some might say that God would be offended; I say God's got just as sick a humor as the rest of us, and appreciates people not taking him/her/it/them/us too seriously. I want that bumper sticker, and I'll find it, by cracky!